Let It Go
Is there a secret to being happy? I’ve heard it mentioned before and I’ve seen eye-grabbing headlines but surely it’s impossible to have a ‘one size fits all’ approach to happiness. We are all individuals. Cat GIF’s make me pretty happy but make my husband want to throw his phone out the window. Each to their own I guess.
However, if I had to pick one thing that could contribute to a better emotional state for the majority of people, do you know what it would be? Letting go of our grudges. This means moving on from fallouts, forgiving those who we feel have wronged us or perhaps forgiving ourselves. Grudges don’t necessarily have to mean arguing and falling out with someone. They can be something that we leave unspoken, that festers inside us and plays on our minds when we are alone.
When you think about it bearing a grudge is pretty easy. Holding on to our hurt and falling out with each other is part of human nature. Someone does something that makes us feel angry, sad or disappointed and we simply let those negative emotions take over and drive us. Or maybe it is something that we ourselves have done that we are ashamed of. And we let that shame stay with us and make us feel bad about ourselves.
It is hard to fight these negative emotions and it is certainly difficult to forgive others or to forgive ourselves. It would mean that when we are knocked down we pick ourselves up and keep moving forwards instead of fuming at the side-lines; because although bearing grudges might be easier, it won’t make us happy.
How do we let go of grudges? How do we learn to forgive and put grievances behind us? I think it is different for everyone. It is impossible not to get angry sometimes. If I told my husband that from now on we were never going to argue or fall out he would laugh at me. The real skill is in being able to let that anger pass by like a brief summer breeze, not to grip on to it but to let it trickle through your fingers.
So when you are feeling bad, either because of someone else or yourself, just think of Frozen, conjure up your inner Elsa (feel free to sing it if you like) and let it go.
Written by Helen Monger
